Things to ponder for 2007

This list comes from none other than GT's star commentator Dick:

10. Life is sexually transmitted.

9. Good health is merely the slowest rate someone can die

8. Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich..

7. Give a person a fish net and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

6. Some people are like a slinky... not really good for anything, but you still can't help but laugh when they fall downstairs.

5. Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital dying of nothing

4. We all could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

3. Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars, and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents???

2. In the 60's, people took LSD to make the world weird. Today the world is so weird people take Prozac to make it normal.

1. AND THE NUMBER ONE THOUGHT FOR 2007: We know exactly where one cow with mad-cow-disease is located among the millions of cows in North America, but we haven't a clue where thousands terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of fighting terrorism.